The Velveteen Rabbit

"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand." http://digital.library.upenn.edu/women/williams/rabbit/rabbit.html

{If you have not read or do not remember the story of the Velveteen Rabbit, you can read it in full at the above link}

My friend Frankie Picasso posted on my facebook wall that the reason people are inspired by me and my poetry is because I am the REAL deal. Thank you Frankie! I was not always living my authentic life. I was not living from a state of be-ing. I put a wall around my heart and spirit for protection. While I was graced by God when I was paralyzed with polio at the age of 5, there was no one telling me that I am loveable with all of my imperfections. There was no one encouraging me to be real. I thought I had it all figured out. I would concentrate on my studies, work hard, succeed and that would be my life.

But there was an inner knowing, there was the desire to be whole and to be real. The gift of post polio syndrome led me to go inside. Physically I could no longer run around and do and escape from the pain. It was time to heal. It was time to become. It was time to be real. It is a time to unearth the hidden treasure of me. To dust off the layers of trauma and to look at the beliefs I harbored about myself and how the world works is a journey of discovery. The pain and the grief are transformed by God's Love, and the healing comes with forgiveness and gratitude.

When fear or flashbacks try to take hold and beckon me to contract and hide inside, I acknowledge their presence and ask that The Presence help the feelings to melt away. I can harness the power of imagination to create positive thoughts or thoughts of dread and worry. It's the same process so it makes a lot more sense to allow the love and light and joy and optimism to flow through me as God intends it to. I can open my heart to receive God's Love and allow myself to be REAL or I can contract into a state of allowing the beliefs drilled into me and reinforced with a belt to loom over my head. Is there really a choice here? I breathe deeply filling my heart with overflowing gratitude for the love and lovely people now in my life. Just as I was once tossed aside like the Velveteen Rabbit {after the Boy contracted scarlet fever and was sent to be burned to get rid of the germs}, wonderful healing angels came into my life to help me embark on a wonderful journey of transformation.


Poetry and photos of my Boston Marathon journey are now available at www.marymcmanus.com

Thanks for joining me on my journey of love

God bless and be well

With love,
Mary