Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Three Weeks Later....

So here I am three weeks after I ran yes ran the Boston Marathon. That is an amazing accomplishment for anyone but for me - it is a miracle. I am experiencing my body in a totally new way. I went from intensive outpatient rehab at Spaulding Rehab to personal training and then training for a Marathon. I had no idea that a body could feel good - let me say that again - I had no idea that a body could feel good. I feel so good that I canceled my appointment with my energy healer, Janice yesterday because there was no need. Today, my daughter and I went out for our twice around Jamaica Pond. It was a glorious Spring day and a perfect running day. She kept a really brisk pace and we did about a 13 minute mile. My heart rate went up to 173 during one of the sprints she led and my average heart rate was 150 - for 43:11. Not bad for this 55 year old polio survivor!

What is helping me to keep a healthy body in addition to doing the exercises prescribed by Janice, doing core strengthening and stretching and walking and running is maintaining my spiritual health. In this world overflowing with bad news and events swirling around me, I was so blessed to attend a service at the Lord's Gathering Church in Woburn. Now I am not an evangelical person by nature; I do have a deep faith and practice spirituality every day but I have to tell you - it was like going to a rock concert for God. The energy, the love that flowed, focusing on the Good News, feeling the unconditional love that flows from Jesus and God and the Holy Spirit {and whatever form your God or higher power may take} was indescribable. I was invited on Saturday to share my journey with the Women's Mother's Day Brunch and to do a book signing; the Spirit moved me to return on Sunday where my friend spoke. She talked about God knowing us even before we were born and I just felt God's love flow through her. I feel as though my recovery from post polio syndrome is complete.

Confession time - I have had episodes of being absolutely terrified. When I went out for lunch last week with my beloved trainer, I told her that I was afraid I would go backwards and lose functioning and strength again. She reassured me that we would resume strength training once I made a full recovery from the marathon. I told my husband that I'm afraid about my business continuing to thrive. I bought into the incredible psychology of fear that is happening in the world. And this psychology of fear tapped right into the depths of my soul. What was I really afraid of? I was afraid that just like I dropped to the ground 50 years on June 3, 1959 that my world would once again come to a screeching halt. I was afraid that everything would stop just like it did after my dad suicided when I was 17. But the great thing about fear is that it is false evidence appearing real.

How do I address the fear? I realize that fear is a habit - my thoughts know just what to do to trigger that marvelous solar plexus clutch.(read with sarcasm) I decided that it was time once again to have a real heart to heart chat with God only this time I did so in the presence of my husband asking him for his love and support along with God. And I asked him to pray with me.I wept from the depths of my soul and shared with him the fears I was harboring and had been harboring for so many years.I dared to be vulnerable and open and to ask God and my husband to help me know that I deserve to be pain free, to feel free in mind, body and spirit and to feel safe and secure in the knowledge that I am God's child - perfect in all of my imperfections. I am an expert at coping with pain and challenges and anticipating problems; celebrating and expecting great things to happen is very new for me.

I felt such a sense of peace and love after praying with the women at the Lord's Gathering Church. I also had an incredible epiphany - I would do the work that I do - writing customized poetry for all occasions - for free. I would give my books away for free if I did not have a mortgage and bills to pay. So I need to imagine that I am independently wealthy and that I can do everything for free and really, really feel it and know it and along with this - I thank God for everything I have right now and knowing that every need is being met right now in this present moment. Every time I feel that fear I recognize it - and ask God to please take care of this and release it to God. I replace the habit of fear with the habit of trust. I replace the thoughts of worry with knowing and feeling God's unconditional love for me. When I imagine a negative outcome for some situation, I switch on the light and I reprogram myself to imagine a positive outcome. After all - look at what imagining a positive outcome has created in my life? Healing from a progressive neurological disease, running the Boston Marathon and raising over $10,500 for Spaulding Rehab Hospital, having a book published and creating a business from scratch. Why am I gonna stop now?

To order the book of inspirational poetry which helped me heal mind, body and spirit, "New World Greetings:Inspirational Poetry and Musings for a New World" log onto www.newworldgreetings.com I donate 20% of the proceeds to Spaulding Rehab's International Rehab Center for Polio to fund much needed education, outreach, advocacy and research to help other polio survivors.

To give a gift from the heart for any occasion, to say thank you to someone special or to promote your business in a new way, check out my samples at www.newworldgreetings.com.

You'll be glad you did!

There's still time to donate to Team McManus go to www.firstgiving.com/teammcmanus

It's a new day and a new starting line. Have a great run!

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