Sunday, March 8, 2009

In God I Trust - Release & Heal

After last Thursday's meeting with the BAA for charity runners, one phrase stood out in my mind "there is a time limit - we close down after 6 hours." Mind you, there was a wealth of information given out over two hours - some of it helpful, some of it more anxiety producing than settling but my mind landed on a six hour time limit.I was blessed to meet Tim from the Just Finish community and met some of his fellow charity runners. Race for Rehab sat together as a team and I could feel the excitement build. I just assumed that the concern about running over six hours, could be easily addressed - it was but not in the way I had anticipated.

When I met with my energy healer,Janice on Friday, she reassured me that they are not going to close down the course in six hours; there are runners who come through at all times. {I had already email'ed our event coordinator and have her ask the BAA what if.....} Janice and I did a lot of work on releasing and detoxifying beliefs and releasing events which no longer serve my authentic self. The beliefs come from the image I held of myself as a polio survivor and as a survivor of childhood abuse. I created space inside of me in order to receive all the love, light, healing, joy and abundance from the Universe. I was ready for a great training run on Saturday and I felt refreshed and renewed - blessed by the encounter with Janice and God.

Yesterday's training run was amazing. I decided to fuel per the schedule of the BAA. First water stop at 2 miles and then 1 mile thereafter with water and gatorade. Since I don't do gatorade, I decided to use my gel pack beginning at 1 hour and then supplementing with clementines and pretzels. We decided to run around Jamaica Pond since there was still a lot of snow and ice on the ground; we also revamped the miles since we have to run this Friday rather than Saturday (we're having a benefit concert on Saturday) and to do two long runs in one week this close to the Marathon did not make sense. The weather was amazing - sunny, a little breezy at times and temps in the 50's. I unzipped my running pants and ran in a short sleeve running shirt. No hats,no gloves, no jackets, no scarf! We decided to run for four hours and see how many miles we could get in. Ruth Anne of Team McManus cannot run on Friday so she decided to do her 19 miles and then do runs during the week. I listened to my iPod and in the middle of our run I heard God say, 'you're gonna run it in 6 hours...claim it for yourself'. We ran 15 miles at a 15:20 min/mile pace and I ran almost the entire way. There are no major hills in this run but there are small hills and downhills throughout the run and after we ran for 2 hours, we picked up speed - just as we will after we hit the half marathon mark on Marathon Monday.

Last night, one of our Race for Rehab's teammates had a fund raiser. Our event coordinator sat with us and we talked about the amazing day, training runs and then she said she had gotten my email. She said she could ask the BAA what if I don't finish in six hours, what happens with the champion chip, etc but after all, when I signed on for this, I said that I would run it in six hours. My stomach initially clutched; what was I thinking? How could I run this in six hours and then I remembered - God told me to claim it and not worry about the how's - let it happen.

Today, I experienced low energy. I decided to clean house and do some laundry - always therapeutic for me (besides with all of this training and fund raising, I could not remember the last time I cleaned or changed linens). It's a beautiful Spring day - perfect for cleansing. Fear gripped my soul - what if our event coordinator emails the BAA and they disqualify me? What if......and then I decided to release all of this - I AM going to run the Boston Marathon; I AM going to run it in six hours and if I do not run it in six hours, God will provide - in God I trust! I email'ed our event coordinator and told her she need not follow up with the BAA - I am going to run the Boston Marathon in six hours.

Janice told me on Friday that there is a lot of strength in being able to experience weakness and vulnerability and to share this with others. She gave me tools to be able to become a conscious creator and release feeling victimized or punished by circumstances of life. She told me that it is time for me to receive; that my life was out of balance because I always gave so much and would not allow myself to receive believing I was not worthy to receive. It is now time to receive love, support, joy, camaraderie, being part of a team, God's light and healing and to strengthen myself mind, body and spirit as I prepare for the run of a lifetime.

To learn more about how poetry helped inspire my body to heal, the company that was born out of the crisis of post polio syndrome, and to order a copy of my book of inspirational poetry (I donate 20% of the proceeds to Spaulding Rehab) go to

To donate to Team McManus, you can go to

God bless and see you at the finish line,

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